All Things Korean

OK, so I am a week late on this post but my laptop is suffering from injuries sustained by a 1 year old. For Lily's Gotcha Day we began with Korean bbq with Grandma and Grandpa. This was their first experience with Korean food. After that we headed to Le Matin de Paris. Yes the name is French but the desserts are primarily Korean?? Wonderful breads, cakes and doughnuts too. We came across a place just like this in Seoul last year. We are pretty fortunate to have a whole bunch of Korean restaurants, bakeries and businesses all around 20 minutes away. They actually call it Koreatown!
We tried the bingsoo. First of all...it's huge. There is crushed ice topped with fruit, followed by frozen yogurt and covered with frosted flakes! That's right, frosted flakes. Interesting right?? We also went to town on the red bean doughnuts which are delicious. It was late and the kids were melting down and probably disturbing the others trying to enjoy their tea, but it just had to be done. It was our family's first gotcha day. Oh yea, of course the gotcha day balloons I ordered arrived the next day.

8SFUS9WTAZVG

Wordless Wednesday

Family Day!!

So I know lots of people call it the "Gotcha Day" but I still haven't decided if I really love that. It seems like a term used when you catch or grab something away, kind of sounds like you are purchasing an item to me also. Maybe I am overanalyzing but whatever you call it, it is a day that has changed our lives forever so it must be celebrated!


I am posting 2 videos. The first is the actual good-bye at Eastern. We have lots of footage leading up to this when we were spending time with Lily's foster parents, getting last minute feeding instructions and being given supplies for the trip home. They gave us the toy we had sent her in a care package, food, diapers, bottles, clothes, even a towel so she would recognize the scent from what would soon be her old home. They had her armed for travel with her own backpack too...so cute. I was so proud to see the foster mom wearing the bracelet we gave to her at the first meeting. It was difficult to absorb anything being said since my heart was just racing the entire time. Not nervous to get our baby, but because I kept imagining the feelings of her foster parents and hoping the pain of the good-bye wouldn't be too bad. From watching other family videos from Eastern, I knew what was coming and how it was going to happen. I can feel the anxiety even now.


As soon as our driver was ready, one of the directors enterred the room. She instructed us to pack up, placed a hand on Hye Won and delivered the famous prayer that has been used for years as babies go off to begin their new lives. I can see the foster mom's face change from cheerful to distraught as she held my new daughter tightly and calmed her fidgeting. When the prayer was done, we presented them with more gifts, this time wine and flowers with a letter to them we had translated into Korean. They had been so wonderful with our baby for 10 months of her life. We headed down the stairs to the back entrance and we were told to say our goodbyes. It was pretty awkward as we lingered there, not wanting to leave. I caught a glimpse of a young pregnant woman watching us from the top of the stairs, most likely envisioning her own babies journey. Even though the process is orchestrated in order to avoid a long drawn out ordeal, it was still so hard. I managed to snap the last photo of Hye Won with her foster mom (probably uncomfortable for her, but I actually love the shot). They even had to tell us where to sit in the car!! It was very quick after that. As soon as I sat down, the foster dad handed me the baby, they started waving, saying "good- bye" and just as we were about to pull away, the foster mom stuck her head in the car for one last kiss. Through my tears all I could say was "Thank-you." After watching this video, I wish I had given the foster mom a great big hug, (even though I had read that it wasn't customary to do that) but it all happened so fast. There was so much to take in and really I think she was just so focussed on Hye Won and not on us at that moment. We hope to see her again one day, and when the time does come, I will be sure to embrace her!





The second video is much more calm. We were preparred for Hye Won to freak out in the car but she ended up falling asleep in my arms and then napping at the hotel. I forgot to mention that usually the babies are given as families are on their way to the airport but they decided to give Hye Won to us the day before our flight. We didn't expect for it to go down that way and no we did not ask for her to be given to us earler. Our agency had advised us not to do that since it was considerred disrespectful. It just worked out that way with our early flight time and the fact that she was doing so well with us at the first meeting. Anyway, you'll see how it went from anxiety and emotion to happiness and calm. At least for a little while. What you won't see, however, is the way she kept us up half the night crying, clearly confused and sad not knowing who the heck we were. We thought for sure the flight home would be a nightmare. Thank heaven when she woke the next morning, she was actually fine, a joy the entire way home taking 3 naps and has been smiling ever since. What an unbelievable, unforgettable, don't know what I did to deserve it life experience! Happy Gotcha Day!




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FP8aWmpwTa0

1 Year Ago

It was one year ago today we were in Seoul meeting our little girl for the first time. I can still feel my nervous stomache. All of the waiting, preparing, the extra 2 month delay. The laying in bed at night wondering what she was doing, what she would look like. Was she happy? Was she loved? Would she hate us? What size was she wearing? Sobbing at YouTube videos. What would the boys be like with a Korean sister? Then of course, the trip around the globe...all for this moment.

That day was more than we ever dreamed it would be. Smiles were glued to our faces. I thought for sure I would just break down in tears but that didn't come until a few days later. The meeting with Lily, seeing the other babies getting ready to go to to their foster homes, the lunch with the agency president and then finding out we were going to get Lily for keeps a day earlier then we expected!! For all of these memories, we are so grateful.

Thank heaven we are back to school and have some kind of routine again. Eight straight snow days plus weekends, not to mention Rick and another seminar!! It was really enough to push me over the edge. By day 3 the boys were over it and had no interest in going out in the cold so it was back and forth between the toys, video games and the TV. We did manage to get Lance to read 3 books though. We were all battling colds as well so the cabin fever was pretty severe. Being from NY, I am really not used to the fact that as soon as a few flurries fall, the city shuts down. The snow did, however, make for some beautiful photos but we are ready for spring! Here is a Lily update:

* She says "I Do" and wants to do everything herself.

* She gives tight hugs and makes this cute squeeze sound.

* She is into every drawer, every cabinet, and even opens the pantry door.

* She spells her name to us and pretends to write it.

* In her crib, she has to sleep with her duck, her horse, her doll and her mini mouse. Then has to be covered with the same 2 blankets. All were gifts from family and friends.

* She says "ahh baby" every time she sees a photograph.

*She hates to drink from a sippy cup and does everything the boys do!

* The drama has begun. She had mastered the pout and cries when you say "no" to her.

Final

About 2 weeks ago we recieved the papers from the attorney stating that Lily's adoption was final and that her name had been changed. After we receive the certificate of foreign birth, we can then proceed with the ss number and passport. It is seriously hard to believe that we have been home from Korea for almost one year and that the paper work is coming to an end.

After opening the envelope, I was met with mixed feelings. I was happy to be finished with the whole legal thing but I couldn't help but feel sad as well. Sad for Lily's birth mom and the end of the name that she chose for her. Sure it's still a part of her but still it was sort of a goodbye. I had visions of the future where Lily asks about her Korean name and why we didn't keep it or incorporate it into her new name. I was hoping she wasn't destined to be one of those adoptees who have resentment towards us for robbing her culture from her. I remembered our referral papers with the meaning of Hye Won. Grace and pretty is what it read. I was then told soon after that it was more like "God's grace and pretty flower." What name could be more perfect then Lily? Here is the first photo I ever took myself of precious Hye Won as she was called for the first 10 months of her life.